Psychic Debris, Crowded Closets
The Relationship Between the Stuff in Your Head and What’s Under Your Bed
Foreword by Sari Solden, M.S., LMFT
The new book by Regina Lark and Judith Kolberg Emotional Labor: Why A Woman’s Work is Never Done and What To Do About It, brings into bold relief a concept that may come as a surprise to many. Although it is 2021, there is a deeply held practice and belief by women that despite advances in “sharing the household tasks” with partners, they still carry the largest share of what the authors call the emotional labor for the family. Even while men increasingly share, help, or take on many of the tasks of childcare, home care, laundry and cooking, women of all ages very often continue to carry the mental and emotional work load and feelings of responsibility for the smooth operation of the household and the well-being of its members.
This comes as no surprise to psychotherapists such as myself, who hear daily shame-filled “confessions” from women with organizational challenges. The “unwritten job description” that I first wrote about in 1995, outlined the internalized gender role expectations that lead women to feel hyper-responsible for tending to the “niceties of life”; everything from remembering their mother- in-law’s birthday, their sister’s anniversary, sending flowers for sympathy, making sure the children have regular doctor and dentist appointments, writing thank you notes, planning parties, problem solving, attending to hurt feelings, teacher conferences, and on and on, and, of course, as the authors describe so colorfully, making sure that no one goes without the “f—ing ketchup! “
In my work over the last thirty years with women with ADHD, I have seen how the challenges with executive function (the management functions of the brain that keep our daily lives coordinated and smooth running) painfully collide with these gender role expectations, resulting in a toxic mix of clutter and shame that deeply affect their core sense of self and often the power dynamic in their intimate relationships.
Nao Deixe Para Depois – A Relacao Entre Bagunca Mental E Armarios Abarrotados (Em Portugues do Brasil)
Não é porque algo trouxe felicidade no passado que precisa ser guardado para sempre” Um armário abarrotado é a manifestação de uma mente bagunçada? Não deixe para depois nos apresenta formas de entender a relação entre o lixo mental e a bagunça nos nossos espaços de trabalho ou em casa. De forma prática e objetiva, Regina F. Lark nos apresenta uma série de exercícios e reflexões acerca da relação entre a desordem e o impacto dela em nosso corpo, mente e espírito. Abra o coração, a cabeça e os armários e comece agora a se libertar da bagunça.
Purchase Now on AmazonWomen’s Experiences of the Second World War: Exile, Occupation and Everyday Life
Mark J. Crowley
Sandra Trudgen Dawson
The Second World War was a conflict that affected the everyday life of millions of people around the globe.¹ The war was truly global, and its impact felt far from the battlefields. Indeed, this was
Using a very wide range of detailed sources, the book surveys the many different experiences of women during the Second World War.
Many existing studies on the role of women in the Second World War concentrate on women’s increasing participation in the workplace and on their struggles to cope with rationing and shortages. This book goes further, exploring women’s wartime experiences much more fully. Drawing on a wide range of sources including oral interviews, scrapbooks, personal letters, diaries, newspaper articles, Mass Observation files and memoirs, the book illustrates some of the similarities and differences of women’s wartime experiences in different situations in different countries. Specific subjects covered include experiences of exile and living under occupation, of coping with proximity to fighting and to the frontline, and of dealing with everyday life in trying circumstances. The book draws out how factors such as political beliefs, nationalism, economics, religion, ability, geography and culture all had an impact. Overall, the book reveals a great deal about the complexities and nuances of women’s experiences in this period of enormous upheaval.
Contributors: Patricia Chappine, Nupur Chaudhuri, Sylvie Crinquand, Beth Hessel, Sarah Hogenbirk, Regina Lark, Bernice Lindner, Alexis Peri, Kelly Spring, Michael Timonin, Angela Wanhalla, Wai-Yin Christina Wong.